I was preparing to send my son, whom I’ll call “Ben,” to college in the spring of 2009. It was my intention to pay his way so that he wouldn’t have to work and could focus on his studies. In fact, this was my solemn promise to him (and to myself) since he was a child. It was the best gift I could possibly give him … or so I thought.
Miraculously, I had managed to put all the tuition money away in a state-sponsored college fund. I say miraculously, because my propensity was to spend far beyond my means. So I felt pretty darned proud of myself, having made good on my promise despite my proclivities.
But when we actually began the process of selecting the school, I discovered that in-state tuition was just a fraction of the total college costs. I would have to cough up another $7,200 a year to cover housing, food, books, and other expenses!
That’s when I hit bottom. I was filled with guilt, shame, and remorse at the thought of all the cash I could have saved if I hadn’t acted like credit cards were free money. The biggest delusion I had was that somehow, some way, the money would be there when I needed it.
Well, it wasn’t.
Instead, my debt was inching up and would soon exceed my income. I had no idea where I would find that extra money.
It was at that point that I went to a support group for compulsive debtors. On April 24th, 2009, I stopped using money as a drug. I cut up my credit cards and canceled the accounts. With the help of the group, I learned how to say no to myself, live within my means, and pay off my credit card debt for the last time. Fortunately, the extra money I needed became available through a combination of good decisions about how I would spend my income and my ex-husband grudgingly agreeing to contribute a few thousand dollars toward the first year.
Hallelujah.
I finally breathed easy. Ben would be going to college and I would keep my promise.
Or so I thought.
Financially, all went as planned freshman year. But in the middle of sophomore year, I became disabled. My income was drastically reduced and…
